tour member's attitude talk

[darth_lucifer]

Maybe a bad thread to start/maybe the darker side no body talks abt in open but I am dead sure we all must have faced it

lets talk it out here

Most of the times things can be ignored,would like to know some tough scenarios you faced and if possible how you handled it.Roughing up people/thrashing aint my cup of tea.

Let me start:

1]People who come with the group and throw bottles/plastic wrappers all around and keep repeating it inspite of repeated requests to stop.

2]Members who take hours to get out of the bed.At times two/three people share a room and the queens keep sleeping while you finish brushing/shitting/maybe bath or shave complaining there is just one bathroom.Bad health is understandable but at times its pure laziness. Is it fair???Happened once that while I was with XYZ and was supposed to start at 3 am and I woke up at that time and eventually we started at 8am.Time is precious we all agree.Do we abandon that person??

3]Who takes decisions during the group ride??Do we nominate someone or one is it one who screams the most or someone who is the bossiest or is the ride organizer and someone whom we nominate beforehand or is it democracy??

Purpose of this thread:
With all the who's who of tourers(bikewallas/carwallas/trekkers) who have been thru all this hopefully we would end up with a set of commandments/guidelines/ informal rulebook we can follow.

We are assuming that situations are hypothetical and tolerance is in place

[abhi1975]

Darth, this is not a bad thread. I'm sure most go through this kinda problems. Lets discuss it out.

I think the idea is to find out the like minded people and travel together. How to find out whether a person is like minded or not? Well, I think I have seen it in someone's signature that there's no better way to learn about a person, about his/her mind, attitude, etc than through traveling together. I totally endorse the view and believe that through traveling together only we can know about it.

About the points you have raised

1) I believe in cleanliness/orderly behavior though I'm not a cleanliness freak. I can tolerate untidy behavior to some extent. When that threshold is breached and if I see that after mentioning it clearly fellow traveler/s are not paying attention, I will not ride with him/her in future.

2) Time is the most vital thing while traveling. So everybody should follow the schedule properly. However once in a while if someone becomes a bit lazy and request me to give him/her a little more time, I will do so. But if I see that it's happening too frequently and too much casually then I will surely express myself and if things still don't work out then I will not not ride with him/her in future. But dumping someone, well I would not do that unless it becomes extremely necessary i.e. when I will run out of my vast tolerance limit.

3) I believe in democracy and acknowledge other's superiority. Decision should be taken jointly considering everyone's viewpoint and after giving them due weightage. I think while riding together, through many incidents a leader will emerge in his/her own capacity. If I see such a man/woman in the group then I have no problem following his/her decision.

To sum up, understanding should be there among all the members of the team. If it's been found that reaching agreement/unison is not possible then I will not travel with him/her/them in future anymore.

Will appreciate other members inputs regarding this. Other points may also be raised.

[darkside_of_d_sun]

Simple solution: Know your co-travellers better before you travel with them. And when that is not an option, set your priorities, for whom you are travelling, yourself or for the fun of being in a group?

P.S. Keep the linens for the washing machine guys.

Cheers,
Shamik

[hitanshu]

Agree with Shamik. Small rides before long rides.

I've done most of my job time rides solo, but back in campus have organised ~300km rides with 14 bikes, 20+ ppl etc. So there as the most experienced campaigner, I was the boss. And consequently, I set the rules. And with typical B school study pressures, everyone saw the logic of hard deadlines.

1. Thankfully, we have very few of those. I suggest picking it up two or three times. Most guys are just lazy and once reminded, behave much better.

2. I will agree. Your trip is your own. Abandon the bugger. 5 hours delay is personally unacceptable to me except ill health. Getting piss drunk doesnt cut it for me.

Heck, take the Pushkar 2006 for example. All the boys just didn't do anything but laze around PFC (mighty fun I must add). But I had a schedule and I stuck to it. Thankfully and for my best stars, Saurabh Sachan was there too.

3. The most knowledgeable/experienced in that area/organizer. Else of course, if someone takes decisions which don't fit with my schedule, I move ON. No hard feelings. Its always what's best for the group.

Mar 05, first ride to Dangs, the caliber's gearbox had a bearing jammed. So I stopped for repairs at a BAL A.S.S in the first village enroute I could, and told everyone to continue ahead tho 150km ahead was no mobile zone! I started 3 hours late, and somehow fortituously met up with junta at the rendezvous area. There was no point delaying a 2 day ride for my mishap.

4. There's another. Just once till date but left an extremely bad impression. Others in Pushkar06 know what I'm talking about - junta who come for a camping ride in the desert but don't contribute their share of work. Its here that one really really appreciates stellar people like Vivek Sharma. What else do you call someone who carries his own tent, but devotes time to help fixing other common tents, is the FIRST one to volunteer to go get food (the sandy route was clutch burner and tough - I myself was afraid of being able to make it back or not with ganja tyre) - wakes up first thing morning, but again spends 1.5+ hours wrapping up common tents because others didn't. And I must add, in our miscalculation, we'd requested less rotis, and vivek ji had lesser dinner than others. But he didn't mind. With him, I'd happily go for a ride anywhere except he's too fast for slowpokes like me

But on the whole, happily, I've not done group rides for a while now.

[kamikaze]

That is why I do not want to go for ride with you guys....

Thats why you travel - drink all night, wake up at 11 in the morning and not leave before1 PM, lunch at 2 pm tea break at 4 pm and start drinking again by 8 pm. wats with the rush man? I hate it when people wake you up as they brush an take a bath and wat not. Let me sleep guys!

+1 on Vivek Sharma. Best bike riding partner ever. Not only did I learn about riridng, I also saw how disciplined he is.

In fact most of the people I have been on a trip with have been great. Some of them have their own agenda but then were never PITA (Pain in the A**). I am usually careful when choosing ppl to ride with. Thats why I never went on a ride with Hitanshu. :P

It is more relevant in bike tours but I hate it when newbies try to immitate experienced riders in speed (not technique) and end up crashing ruining it for others. Mistakes do happen and crashes are part of a ride (I crashed once riding with Vivek and he was very very supportive) but then its about knowing your limits.

[Yogesh Sarkar]

Before I answer your questions, let me just say, every one has different perception/expectation about what a particular ride is going to be about. For some it is about running from one place to another, while for others it is about exploring places and for few others it is just about getting drunk at a particular place or just lazing around.

Now you can either do a group ride with a lot of people with different perspectives and expectations and stick with what ever the majority is doing or put your foot down and stick to the plan you guys had initially agreed upon, irrespective of whether someone comes with you or not.

At times I have gone with what majority have said and at others I have said to the hell with every one and stuck with my own plan, even if that meant doing few things solo. Frankly I have never come to regret doing a few sections solo while I have always regretted later, sticking with the majority decision to just hang around a particular place, irrespective of how much fun I might have had at that juncture.

At the end of the day, I would rather do solo ride then be stuck with a bunch of lazy buggers for whom a trip is just about lazing around or getting drunk. Having said that, having riding partner/s with similar outlook would help you get more out of a particular ride and can make a world’s of a difference.

Originally Posted by darth_lucifer

1]People who come with the group and throw bottles/plastic wrappers all around and keep repeating it inspite of repeated requests to stop.

Shout at them at the top of your voice and if situation demands, clean up after them and make sure you don’t take them to your next ride.

Originally Posted by darth_lucifer

2]Members who take hours to get out of the bed.At times two/three people share a room and the queens keep sleeping while you finish brushing/shitting/maybe bath or shave complaining there is just one bathroom.Bad health is understandable but at times its pure laziness. Is it fair???Happened once that while I was with XYZ and was supposed to start at 3 am and I woke up at that time and eventually we started at 8am.Time is precious we all agree.Do we abandon that person??

Keep telling them to wakeup again and again and if they still don’t simply get out of the room and do something fruitful like capturing the sunrise. Abandoning someone in a room, while they are still sleeping is a big no-no, even if it affecting your ride. But if they don’t change their attitude, you know whom not to bring on your next ride.

Originally Posted by darth_lucifer

3]Who takes decisions during the group ride??Do we nominate someone or one is it one who screams the most or someone who is the bossiest or is the ride organizer and someone whom we nominate beforehand or is it democracy??

Usually the guy who plans the ride initially or the Admin , democracy in rides is bad and would usually just mean wasted time and would leave a bad taste in every ones mouth. Because those who are against a particular decision would continue to argue against it and would feel bad for sticking with the decision others have made, while others will get pissed off by the arguments. It helps if every one hates one person, rather than every one around them!

At the end of the day, you are not out there to improve or change someone, if you feel that your attitude/outlook doesn’t match, don’t do another trip again with that person as it would be a rerun of the previous experience.

[kamikaze]

Originally Posted by darth_lucifer

Purpose of this thread:
With all the who's who of tourers(bikewallas/carwallas/trekkers) who have been thru all this hopefully we would end up with a set of commandments/guidelines/ informal rulebook we can follow.

We are assuming that situations are hypothetical and tolerance is in place

Step by Step solution:

1. Decide your own purpose of the travel (if you are planning it)
2. Communicate the 'purpose of the ride' clearly.
3. Discuss the travel plan and format.
Rush ride - less frequent stops.
Photogrpahy trip - more frequent stops
Easy trip - Stay late late and enjoy the scenery.....watever....
4. Discuss living arrangements. Sometimes there might be issues between - cheap hotel vs more comfortable and expensive hotel.
5. Decide on a itineary and have a buyin on it. Make adjustments to it if you have to beforehand. Write down - this IS the time we LEAVE. Its your choice - u want to take a bath or not an sleep late.
6. Have a little tolerance. If you plan to start at 0600 AM but are able to leave by 630, be happy! You are travelling together.
7. Realise when you are wrong and admit your mistake.

One is not better than other. For ppl who are waking late and stuff - maybe that's their purpose. Discuss before hand. Discuss the budget before hand. Two people - one wanting to stay in Holiday Inn in Manali and one ready to crash in the first hotel they see are two very different people (I mean attitude wise). Think before chosing the partner or atleast dicuss these things before hand.

[kamikaze]

YS beat me to it! Almost same points!

[Yogesh Sarkar]

Dhairya, your points are good. However from experience I have seen that a few people have the habit of agreeing with everything before the ride but would have planned something else in their head that they intend to stick to!

[kamikaze]

Originally Posted by Yogesh Sarkar

Dhairya, your points are good. However from experience I have seen that a few people have the habit of agreeing with everything before the ride but would have planned something else in their head that they intend to stick to!

For those cases, it should be brought to attention on the very first occasion where disagreement happens. Getting aggressive the first time does not help. Let it fly the first time and then point out the time lost at the end of the day (maybe could not reach the place planned initially) and ask for solution from them. I believe any sane person would understand. If they disagree to adhere to plans, offer to split up and then go as per plan. If they do say they want to stick to plans tell them you will kick them in their nuts the next morning if they do not wake up. Leave them to their own fate if they still do not agree.
I personally never drink on adventure trips. I need the energy and attention. Drinking can be done in bars at home. Beer tastes same everywhere.