Gangolihat to Delhi
At 3:30am I suddenly woke up, feeling something different. As if my heart was telling me, time for peace and sleep is over; it is time for the storm to begin. A storm which only the mind can see and the heart can feel, which shakes the very core of your soul and forces you to stand firm on an invisible strand of hope, that only you know exists, and it only exists till you believe in it and it is only as strong as your belief. As birds chirped outside, sun rose and world woke up; my storm was just beginning to fade into the distance, 2 and a half hours after it had begun. Leaving me with that invisible strand of hope, that only I knew existed. I got off from my bed, picked up the G1x Mark II and took one last photograph of the view which had provided me so much peace last night.
I knew that instant that I could no longer remain in Gangolihat and I had to leave as soon as possible. So I took a shower and got ready, in two minds on whether or not to visit Haat Kalika Temple again. After a moment I decided against it and checked out of the hotel and walked onto the main market at around 7am.
A bus for Tanakpur was standing there, but I had to go to Pithoragarh first. So I looked for a shared jeep to Pithoragarh and found one; only problem was that all the front and middle seats were taken, so I had to ride in the back. I also found out that although it hadn’t rained for almost 3 days now (even though it had been raining almost daily this monsoon season), there was landslide at Ghat, which had blocked traffic between Gangolihat and Pithoragarh since 3:30pm yesterday.After filling up Mahindra Max to the brim (two passengers at front, 4 in middle row and six in the bench at the back), our shared taxi finally started from Gangolihat with still not status update on landslide.
People sitting beside me kept changing as we drove towards Ghat, at times there were just 3 of us and at times 6. My knees were beginning to pain quite a bit, not used to the position that they were in and I couldn’t move my legs, I also had my bag on my legs and worst still, person sitting in front of me had his knee jammed up against my knee as well. Funny thing was, external pain only won for brief moments, while the internal battle raged on.
A look back at life; on what I once was and what I had now become and how disappointed I was with certain portions of my own self and after a while, I reached a conclusion. What we cannot accept, must go, and in order for it to go, sometime the entire self needs to be torn down, even at the risk of losing our own self in the process. Maybe that was the Unknown I was looking for or maybe it was just a distraction from the real Unknown I couldn’t yet see.
While the internal battle raged on, we reached Ghat and the good news was, landslide had been cleared and traffic was flowing. Bad news was that we were now stuck in a traffic jam. After a while we managed to drive ahead and our driver wanted to make up for the lost time and drove like a madman. Which didn’t really help with the knee pain and my poor legs only breathed a sigh of relief after we reached Pithoragarh around 11:30am.
As I almost limped to the bus stand, I found Pithoragarh – Delhi bus there, one which was supposed to go through Champawat and starts at noon. Perfect I thought, because I had to visit Champawat to pick up Bal Mithai. So I boarded the bus and once again got the last row before the back bench, sadly I got seat on the side which had 3 seats. With another guy occupying the window seat with long legs, I knew if the third person came, all of us would really be struggling for space. Soon enough an uncle boarded the bus and sat in the middle of both of us. As a result I had two thirds of my seat to hang on to and with the bus swinging from one side to the other, one knee jammed up against the back of the front seat, left side lower back pressed against the somewhat curved end of the seat and hands trying their best to hang on, all I could think was, the real state transport travel has only now begun, not knowing how wrong I was!
Till Champawat I was in deep contemplation mode, all the while trying my best to hold on to my seat. After buying Bal Mithai from Champawat and more importantly stretching my legs, I decided to put on some music, mainly to drown out the voice of 3 passengers who were drunk and talking loudly. While usually I can never think while listening to music, today I could.
After a somewhat rough drive to Tanakpur (yes the same place bus from Gangolihat was going and I did do that Pithoragarh - Ghat section again), it was time to once again stretch the legs for a while, before boarding the bus. Few minutes later, there was a wicked smile on my face. While I hadn’t found the Unknown, I knew what to do to discover myself and discover the extent of my strength and weaknesses, so that I could improve upon them. However that smile was short lived as the bus stopped once again, this time at Banbasa and got packed with more people than technically there were seats. And this time around, all the passengers were long distance with most of them going to Delhi!
Once again I had around 2 third of my seat with knee and back jammed up and at times from side as well, as everyone tried their best to get some space and relax on a hot and humid day in a bus packed to the brim and with no AC! The only relief I got was when the guy at the window walked up to conductor to have a drink while we were crossing Khatima, in few minutes he was back and once again struggle to stay on seat began!
By around 10pm, I was starting to lose my patience, sweating like anything and in pain. Thankfully once again the bus stopped, this time for dinner. After gulping down almost a liter of water, I decided to have my first meal of the day. I hadn’t felt like eating anything since morning and I had been drinking only water, but with my patience almost running out, I thought about having food so that I would calm down a bit and it worked. After having 3 rotis I was feeling better and with a bit more water in, I felt better still.
Thoughts continued and so did the bus journey and the discomfort associated with it, but now I was somewhat used to it and wasn’t getting impatient or angry. At the last pit stop before Delhi, I saw Gangolihat – Delhi direct bus, it was running 20mins ahead of us, seeing it running ahead and somewhat empty, I smiled a bit and then move on towards my bus with no regrets.
We managed to reach Delhi by around 4:30am and after standing and waiting for no. 73 bus for over an hour, I finally got one and reached home at around 6:50am, just 10 minutes short of 24 hours mark, from the time I had left my hotel yesterday.
After changing cloths and downloading photos, I started working on the travelogue, for this one was special and had to be written when thoughts were still lingering in my mind and memories were still livid and not repressed.
For I had gone in the search of Unknown and had in a way, lost a bit of myself in the process and forget about finding Unknown, I hadn’t even found a clue what or who that Unknown was, whom I was chasing so hard?
All I know is, as I look back at this trip, I can only see faint sense of direction that I need to go in to find myself and maybe even find that Unknown I so much desire. And I will continue walking on this path, because I may not know who or what that Unknown is, but I know for sure, that either I belong to that Unknown or that Unknown is a part of my, edging to come out…