No marriage due to biking hobby :(

dhruvpandit

Member
my mom dad searched a girl for my marriage. (thats not a sad news )
parents belive in horoscope so they matched and it was full point or something with her and mine.

i am from vadodara (basically from mumbai) and that girl is from mumbai.
so her parents come vadodara and stay at her uncle's home.

on same day morning they come at my home to see my parents.
the meeting was ok with her parents on morning. but in that first meeting, my father told them
that i am very passionate about biking, and my plan for ladakh for this year was postponed due
to illness of my cousin who was also coming with me for ladakh. and that was the turning point :(
The girl's parents was shocked by this plan...

the conversation was then turned on other point somehow, now it was the meeting time.

i visited thair place in evening to meet the girl personally.
the meeting was pleasant. i am very shy guy with girls and does not like to talk with girls for more time.
but this was simply opposite. we were talking about one hour in a room privately. she was also very comfortable
with me and she was ready to bring this relationship forward. she told me that her brother had some accident on bike
and he had steel shaft inserted in his one leg. so her parents doesn't like bike drivers so much :(
i told her that i drive bike very professionally and with all driving gears, and had never meet even a minor accident till now.
then she told me that her parents want to take marriage within two or three months. she asked me that is it OK for me. so, i told
here that my recent trip for ladakh is postponed to next year, and i would like to have marrige after that. but i told her that two
three month is very little time to understand each other. she agrees my planning and said that she will also come to ladakh if we
got marriage before that and she has full confidence on me that i will not let her hurt.
the conversation was long and we talked too much. she want to study further after marrige and i assured here that i or my family will
never be obstruction in her study or any job or any business plans :)

the her father come in room and told that they want to go somewhere so we should finish soon. so we come outside and i left for home.
they told us that they will call us what is the result :)

but after two days , we had not got thair call. My parents asked me that if i am positive then we can followup with them (generally in our
cast, boy siders should not followup with girl siders , but due to my interest they over-sided this restriction) and called the intermediate aunt.
(aunt had introduced us each other , so it would be better to call her )
aunt told us that her parents are not comfortable with my biking hobby. so they are not agreed to take this ahead.

and after knowing that, my mom directly called the parents of that girl. they answered us that it was negative from girl side.



now the main thing is i know the girl is OK with our relationship. and so i am . but we don't have each other's mobile no. she is also not much active on FB ( not mine friend also ) and i am not sure is it good to contact here ( via FB massage ) directly or not.


now i am perhaps first person who is not going to have marriage with someone who also likes me , but due to my biking hobby :(
 
Last edited:

Yogesh Sarkar

Administrator
Plenty of other fish in the sea, who knows, you might just find someone as passionate as you in traveling and biking.

The way I see it, it is better to not get married than to have nagging in-laws, talking negatively and dismissively about something you are passionate about!
 

DKay

Super User
Its not the end of the world Dhruv. I am sure you will find someone soon enough who is as passionate about you and your hobbies as you will be about her hobbies and her like's. True that marriages are all about being accommodating to each others needs, likes and dislikes but whats the point in entering into a relationship where you have to give up something you are really passionate about.

Ride on man, you have not lost anything as yet for you to be using 3 sad smiley's in your post.

Cheer up, keep riding, go to Ladakh, live your dream hopefully with your future wife and enjoy.

Life is too short to sit and sulk over miniscule events
 
Last edited:

Mangesh Bramhe

I got BlackJack3d
YogeshJi & Dkay Sir have summed it up superbly!!
Maybe, on one of your adventure rides, you could come across a similar-minded person who could well be your life-partner!! :rolleyes: [-o<
You dont have to be sad about anything that has happened!! You haven't lost anything; but the female's family sure did!! :)
Cheer up Brother!!
Woh relation hi kya, where the other-half is not ready to accept you along with your favorite hobby & wants a compromise even on that!! Cheer Up boss!! Life is never out of options!! It was just not meant to be!!
:partyman:
 

dhruvpandit

Member
thanks all ,

but you can see that the girl is ready to go with me on bike anywhere.
but her parents are not comfortable.


and yes, i am just sad coz, i am a guy who don't go for looks, i believe in 6th sense (inner feelings ) and i got very good feeling about that girl.

just want to share here so no other mad biker should show his instincts very early as i do :)
 

KurtRules

Come as you are!
At the end of the day, you have an option to choose a marriage partner, but choosing to drop a hobby is very hard!

I give you an example of myself. My wife, her first message/phone/communication was a FB message which was a direct impact of a motorcycle ride which I had just completed. And we were married 4 months later.

Even though she does not prefer riding on a motorcycle, she is fond of travelling and does not mind my ventures on two wheels. Earlier I just used to tour on 2-wheels. Now I also tour on 4 :)

You will find one, oh you sure will..
 

anupkrverma

Active Member
Ask the same question to yourself ? Are you ready to sacrifice your riding hobby for her ? Perhaps your answer is a no, and she knew it. So may be she also did not felt herself that important to you. Perhaps her no was for real.
Girls are instructed to avoid any negative answer to the boy's questions in first meetings. You should keep this in equation.

When you love a person and really want him/her for life, nothing in the world matters.

So probably you have not met with your soulmate yet. What you are looking for is a wife( as in Indian terms ), not a life partner.
Sorry, but the one will be her for whom you will be ready to sacrifice everything.
Enjoy riding till then.
 
Last edited:

anupmathur

Super Moderator
Staff member
....
but you can see that the girl is ready to go with me on bike anywhere.
but her parents are not comfortable.
...
I'm just a tad confused here. :confused:
Is it the girl or the parents that you are going to marry?
And if she cannot see the difference you are best out of it!
 

dhruvpandit

Member
Ask the same question to yourself ? Are you ready to sacrifice your riding hobby for her ? Perhaps your answer is a no, and she knew it. So may be she also did not felt herself that important to you. Perhaps her no was for real.
Girls are instructed to avoid any negative answer to the boy's questions in first meetings. You should keep this in equation.

When you love a person and really want him/her for life, nothing in the world matters.

So probably you have not met with your soulmate yet. What you are looking for is a wife( as in Indian terms ), not a life partner.
Sorry, but the one will be her for whom you will be ready to sacrifice everything.
Enjoy riding till then.
right said AV,
i can not drop biking in any condition :)

and these posts are giving me very positive feelings now.

thanks to all from deep of the heart

- - - Updated - - -

I'm just a tad confused here. :confused:
Is it the girl or the parents that you are going to marry?
And if she cannot see the difference you are best out of it!
thats confusing to me also anup sir,
but since this is india, she must have to listen to her parents on the same way , and may be she doesn't like her parent's decision, but what she can do? she perhaps don't know about my positive answer also.

but thats past now, and i am trying hard to forgot the incident.
 
Top